


The Emptiness That Comes With Being Alone

by LadyPaige



Series: Dexter's Deepest Desires [4]
Category: Dexter Series - All Media Types
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-06
Updated: 2013-12-28
Packaged: 2017-12-22 16:04:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/915216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyPaige/pseuds/LadyPaige
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Isaak leaves for a few days to get his affairs in order and while he is away the urges of the Dark Passenger come back with a vengeance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Emptiness

**Author's Note:**

> This is part one of two.

To say I was pissed off would be a major understatement. On the outside I was calm as could be, minus a slight downwards twitch of my smile. My mask was slipping, I need to kill.

I knew my body well; the headaches, quick temper and stress was my Dark Passenger's way of saying "I'm waiting but not for much longer." Had the other part of me been able to text I imagine it would have said that, along with a little frowney face, maybe even with one of those 'Greater than' maths symbols as angry eyebrows.

I needed to kill. I had left it far too long, forty-five days too long. The longest I had gone without killing anything (animal or human) since I was eighteen, was after Brian, when Doakes followed me non-stop and when I did get the chance to kill I still could not.

This however was five days longer than that and what was worse was that the unbearable need and anger had occurred within hours. Four days ago it had started, work took up my time to stalk which would not have been much use anyway because I had no one to go after. Not that there was no one likely worth being strapped to my table but likely was not good enough. I had to find the cases that could be linked, find the person, find the evidence, find the kill room, buy things for the kill room; I'm lacking in plastic sheeting, near out of duct tape and there was just no time for all of this. I always keep an eye on my supplies, I always keep an eye out for possible victims, I never don't look forward to my next kill, so what had kept me distracted for all this time minus four days ago? Would you believe Isaak Sirko?

We spent time on the boat, we spent time with Astor, Cody and Harrison; out on the boat, at the beach, even at a zoo. We went out for meals and drinks together and Isaak took me to an outside gun range to prove I could actually shoot. Then there was the time we spend with Harrison and the times we stayed in to watch films. Bit by bit I had forgotten. I looked up possible killers now and again, trading ideas with Isaak but nothing ever came about. I still looked at my slides when I happened to think of them, and run my index finger down the slides oh so gently, pleased to hear the glass pieces lightly taping against the others. There was a want, a want for the thrill but I barely thought about it. I felt no need until Isaak was gone.

"But you have to admit she has a sweet rack." Vince said "God, I would kill to do her."

'Oh God, can I kill for him?' I thought to myself, not that I believed in a God but if there is one please, please, please make a serial killer fall into my sights and give me the time to kill them, Oh and if you could pop to the hardware store too that would be great.

"Hey Dex, who do you think would give the best head?"

'I'm never going to get out of here.' I need to kill but I don't think I even had the control left to do that. I can't take this.

"The blond from the coffee place down by where Peterson nearly got hit in the face with a brick after that gang showed up. Or the red-head that... Dexter?" Vince asked, sounding worried "What's up with your leg? Are you okay?"

I need relief.

"Dexter?"

"What?!" I snapped, my words sounding harsh and cold "What?!"

Silence.

Vince looked stunned but I could not really give a flying fuck at the moment. I was about to demand what was so damn important or if it was just in his nature, like the rest of humanity to get in my damn way all the fucking time, when I heard it.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

The thumps were somewhat light and quite quick. I looked down to see my right leg bouncing it's self off the ground, like that of a recovering addict. I placed both my hands onto the leg and pushed it down, it went down but I could feel the muscles wanting to move. All these feelings, basic as they maybe were attacking me all at once but the emptiness was worse than ever before. What's wrong with me?

\--

"Guys I need your help." Vince said walking into the small kitchen (which was only really used for coffee) where Quinn stood, leaning against the counter, Angel followed behind Vince having been called over by him.

"With what exactly?" Quinn asked un-amused, but the look of fear on Vince's face make him blink.

"Dexter just snapped at me, a decibel or two off a scream." Said Vince.

"What did you do?" Angel asked, moving to stand next to Quinn.

Vince help up his hands in defence "I asked if he was okay. His leg was jumping about like he was about to have a panic attack."

"Is he on someth-" Quinn paused when he saw the elevator doors close behind a fleeing Dexter "He just left."

"What?" Angle asked, looking over to the elevator.

"See." Vince said, turning back from where he had also been looking at the elevator "That's not like Dexter."

"Jamie did say that Dexter did seem a little stressed but this..." he walked over to his desk "I'm going to give Jamie a call, see if she can shine some light on this."

\--

I sat in my living room, swinging back my beer, still pissed of and empty.

Jamie for some reason had told me I could not leave yet, not that it mattered, I was too pissed off to kill. Hello rock bottom, I'm Dexter Morgan.

"Where are you going?" I asked when she started to pack a bag for Harrison.

"Harrison is going to stay with Angle and I for the night." she says "I got hold of a crib for the night, so don't worry." she smiled "Just enjoy your night."

I raised a brow "What?"

"I know you've been unhappy lately so I invited a friend over."

"Who?" I asked.

"You'll see." she said.

Nothing else was said for a long time until Jamie's phone buzzed on the kitchen table, she picked it up and smiled. "Okay," she said "I'm off." she picked up Harrison's bag full of toys and other bits, pulling the strap over her head and lay in on her shoulder. She then when to Harrison's room and picked him up too.

"Say night daddy."

"Night daddy." Harrison said, his words were not very loud but he would in time gain courage in time.

I smiled "Night Harrison."

\--

I sat on the sofa for no longer then 34 seconds when I heard a knock on the door. That must have been the person Jamie had invited, due to their speedy arrival after Jamie left it was safe to say that he or she must have texted her. Would I have really left pretty much as soon as she had? Yes, that was pretty likely. She knew me well.

I got up, placing my beer on the table and made my way the window to see who it was before I let them in, an old habit. I peaked between the plastic binds to see... Isaak?

My heart thumped wildly in my chest and I quickly moved to the door, I grabbed the handle and thankfully remembered that the chain lock was still on. Now that would have been embarrising. I moved the chain away and opened the door.

"Hello Dexter." Isaak said, he smiled but his eyes looked full of worry.

I reached out and held the back of his head. I missed his short hair, his skin, his eyes. I took everything in for about five seconds before I pulled his head forward and slammed his lips against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull him in closer and after a lick at his lips he let me inside.

Isaak allowed himself to me dragged into my apartment but the bang of the door closing behind him changed him. He pushed me against the wall and moved down to kiss my neck, when he got to the area above my jugular he bit down, hard.

The blood started to rush down to my genitals. It felt oh so good. It was amazing just being able to feel again.


	2. That Comes With Being Alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again.

The pleasure that came from the feel of someone pressing their thigh against my aroused area was the same as it had always felt. Until Isaak grinded up, hard. The force behind it make me gasp and the scratch of stubble and feeling of teeth on my neck made me shiver. His bite was strong but gentle enough not to bleed.

I really hated the sickly feel of blood on my sick, especially when it was icy cold.

We moved to the bedroom. We kissed, in a way neither of us had kissed each other before this night; passionate, hungry. I was breathing hard through my nose, not wanting the kiss to end. Every little bit of this felt so intense; a harder, rougher pleasure and did it feel so good.

Caught off guard by the sudden thrust at my crotch, I moaned, before finding myself flipped upon my front. I held myself up by my elbows but my arms were close enough together that Isaak grabbed both my writs in one of his hands. I felt panicked, my distrustful natural, and betrayed experiences kept me so. I was just about to trash out, pull my arms away, roll on to my back and strike, when I felt Isaak's warm breath at my right left ear, his soft lips moved along the shell of my ear as he spoke.

"It's okay." he said.

I paused.

He kissed my ear.

My breathing started to calm, my body relaxing.

He kissed my ear again and then the back of my neck, right on my spine.

I let my head fall forward. The pose was submissive, then again leaning my head to the side before, to give Isaak more of my neck to work with, was a far greater moment of submission but this was less of a sex fuelled act, more trusting.

He moved he weight on to his knees, using the hand that had supported him to unbutton my shirt. His hand moved up and down my abdomen, his little finger caused a shiver to run up my spine when it brushed over my nipple. I sucked in a breath when his finger dipped in to my belly button. Then he found the scar I received when I got into an accident as a child. He ran his finger tips over the rough line and I held my breath and bit my lip to stop the groan that was tingling on my lips.

Then his hand reached down and grabbed hold of my crotch and I moaned, loudly.

I heard his chuckle and as his lips ran from my ear to my neck, I felt his smirk. His long, skillful fingers unbuttoned and unzipped my slacks and slipped his hand inside my boxers. I gasped sharply as his calloused fingers wrapped around me, shuddering as he started to massage me in his grip.

The feeling of someone's fingers working inside me was an odd sensation, that I had never thought of before. My entrance was gradually filled, fingertips rubbing at my internal walls with fingers crooking and scissoring. I found that Isaak had a tendency to fill me in ways I never knew I needed, this was one of them.

The further he went in, the more he stretched me, the more he filled me with pleasures I never knew possible.

Then I was on my back. One of his hands was on me, jerking me slowly, causing my hips to moved with him, trying to increase the pressure. His other hand was in mine, out finger's laced. He kissed my lips as he pushed inside me. There was an initial pain as his head pushed against my rim but then all that was left was pleasure. I felt his think length move inside of me and I could not help but moan and whine, which seemed understandable and less embarrassing than I would have imagined.

I threw my head back when he brushed against something inside me that felt unbelievably incredible. Thrust after thrust, he hit it, increasing in speed as he did so. He thrusts grew into a fast and unrelenting rhythm, pistoning inside of me, hitting that perfect spot each and every time.

* * *

The following morning, I went to work. I had to admit that waking up to Isaak was something I could get used to. We had worked together making coffee and breakfast and the odd kiss on my neck or lips was welcomed, although my body was too worn to do anymore which Isaak seemed more proud than disappointed about.

I walked out of the elevator and straight to my lab. I was unsurprised that before I could even shut the door, there was Batista, holding the door.

"Dex. How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Now that you've had your sexy times with your girlfriend." Masuka said, moving the door further open to see the blood Tech.

Angel gave the lab Tech a dirty look and Quinn appeared on Batista's other side.

It seemed odd to me that for once they were right about something that I did in my spare time... well partially. At least the only bite mark I had was hidden by my shirt collar.

"Why did you hide the fact that you were dating someone, anyway?" Angel asked, a sad look on his face.

I knew this was coming and I had the perfect lie all prepared. However as I dropped down upon my seat, pain hit me. I gasped, leaning forward. I could not help but let out a small pained sounded.

"A ha!" Vince pointed a finger at me, "It's a guy! That's why."

I gave him a look that just said; 'Why Vince? Why?'

"No way." Quinn laughed.

Angel just looked at me with wide eyes.

Maybe it was having Isaak in my life, which almost made me act more human, like I had done with Rita. Maybe, and much more likely, it was because I had never liked Quinn and now he was pissing me off but I found my self calling to him. "Hey, Quinn."

Quinn looked over to me, still chuckling.

I flipped him the middle finger, "Fuck you."

Angel smiled at Quinn's stunned expression. "You really are related to Deb." he said to me.

"Want a pillow, Dex?" Vince asked, looking more serious than joking.

I shifted back on my chair, moving to find a comfortable position but I could still feel that ache. "If you have one."

He left for a second before returning with a small red pillow. Passing it to me, he explained, "Sitting down all day gives me a sore butt."

I looked at it for a second before shrugging and slipping it under my behind. It made things a little better. "Thanks."

"Next time use more lube." he said.

"I'll set a reminder on my phone." I said, hoping that they would go away already.

The three men looked at each other, each wearing smirks.

I heard them leave to the sound of Vince saying; "Dex got gay and sassy."

I raised a brow at that. Gay I get but how was I being sassy?


End file.
